And not quite sure what to say, I'm rather overwhelmed. Things went well this morning, and Figment is still in there, with its little heart ticking away at 183bpm. Measuring 9w3d, and so bigger than Wallaby ever got.
I'm so relieved and happy, and yet I'm also sad. I feel like I can breathe a bit, at least, until our n/t scan. I'm sure the day before that one I'll be back to crying and thinking it's my last day being pregnant.
Don't mind me, I cry a lot. It's the hormones, I swear.
Midwives tomorrow. Need to set up n/t appointment. Need to do a bunch of other things, but all I can do it keep looking at the picture (which is up on the figment page - speaking of which, any of you people on blog.ger know how to get it to upload pictures to the BOTTOM of the post? It's getting rather annoying).
Monday, July 13, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
In further FB tales...
ah, you crazy straight, loss-less people.
A girl I was friends with and worked with in high school just announced on FB that she's pregnant.
And due four days after us. That makes her, what? 8w4d? Ah, the blissful ignorance...
And we'll probably see her, at least in passing, at a wedding in just over a week. Does it make me a bad person that I'm mostly just bitter that she might get people cooing over her while I, in my protective shell, will not?
ETA: She's deleted it. Practical joke, or did she realize it was a bad idea to put it up so soon?
A girl I was friends with and worked with in high school just announced on FB that she's pregnant.
And due four days after us. That makes her, what? 8w4d? Ah, the blissful ignorance...
And we'll probably see her, at least in passing, at a wedding in just over a week. Does it make me a bad person that I'm mostly just bitter that she might get people cooing over her while I, in my protective shell, will not?
ETA: She's deleted it. Practical joke, or did she realize it was a bad idea to put it up so soon?
Thursday, July 9, 2009
9w, and loss of control
I think I've found my perfect pregnancy food. Sadly, that food is peanut butter twix. nom nom nom.
So, yesterday, for about 2 minutes, people who have me friended on FB may have seen a message saying "I hear congratulations are in order!!!"
I promptly panicked, deleted the comment, wrote back to the friend (who happens to be a former co-worker) and asked her to e-mail me. She said simply that she'd heard I was pregnant, and hoped it was true, as she knew it was something that I really wanted. (I really miss working with those folks. Don't miss the Company in the least, but I do miss the company.)
I wrote back explaining, well, yes, but it's still quite early, and in the fall I had a miscarriage later than I am right now, so I'm being very hesitant, etc etc. It's not that I mind her knowing in general - just trying to keep from getting all the congrats and happiness until I'm at a place where I can be happy for them, or at least not paranoid that they'll jinx me. And then I tried to think, who could have told her? Again, not because I'm upset she knows, but because I need to know who else might know.
While I've given the url of this blog to several of my former co-workers, there are only two that I know of who read on a regular basis. (Hi, dears. *g*) One of them hasn't even been there since shortly after we found out, and I'd trust them both not to be randomly telling people. So what does that leave?
Ah, what a tangled web of office relationships we weave. My former boss, who works at my current company, knows. She knew we were trying when we started, she knew about the miscarriage, and she would ask how things were going, so I gave her the it's still early... talk.
She had drinks with one of the folks from the Old Place last week. Who happens to be the boss of the friend who commented on my FB. I asked if that's what happened, she confirmed. She let him know that I wasn't ready for other people to be told not-by-me, and that should be that.
But I really need to learn how to relax and remember that many things are out of my hands. This included. Oy.
So, yesterday, for about 2 minutes, people who have me friended on FB may have seen a message saying "I hear congratulations are in order!!!"
I promptly panicked, deleted the comment, wrote back to the friend (who happens to be a former co-worker) and asked her to e-mail me. She said simply that she'd heard I was pregnant, and hoped it was true, as she knew it was something that I really wanted. (I really miss working with those folks. Don't miss the Company in the least, but I do miss the company.)
I wrote back explaining, well, yes, but it's still quite early, and in the fall I had a miscarriage later than I am right now, so I'm being very hesitant, etc etc. It's not that I mind her knowing in general - just trying to keep from getting all the congrats and happiness until I'm at a place where I can be happy for them, or at least not paranoid that they'll jinx me. And then I tried to think, who could have told her? Again, not because I'm upset she knows, but because I need to know who else might know.
While I've given the url of this blog to several of my former co-workers, there are only two that I know of who read on a regular basis. (Hi, dears. *g*) One of them hasn't even been there since shortly after we found out, and I'd trust them both not to be randomly telling people. So what does that leave?
Ah, what a tangled web of office relationships we weave. My former boss, who works at my current company, knows. She knew we were trying when we started, she knew about the miscarriage, and she would ask how things were going, so I gave her the it's still early... talk.
She had drinks with one of the folks from the Old Place last week. Who happens to be the boss of the friend who commented on my FB. I asked if that's what happened, she confirmed. She let him know that I wasn't ready for other people to be told not-by-me, and that should be that.
But I really need to learn how to relax and remember that many things are out of my hands. This included. Oy.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
8w6d
is what I am today. Or tomorrow, if you ask doctor man, but he's on crack, so we'll go with today.
8w6d is what Wallaby measured when we found out about the missed miscarriage.
I know that size varies - at our first sono, he was measuring small, at the second, he was measuring big. There's no way to know when he actually died.
That doesn't really make today much less nerve-wracking. Thank god for our sanity scan on Monday. Though I almost took J up on her suggestion in the car this morning when she said we should just go in today and demand a scan. I can wait until Monday. I think.
Complicating things further, of course, is that Sunday is the Yarhzeit for both my brother and my grandfather. 6 years and 4 years, respectively. I miss my brother every day, but around anniversaries, I'm always more anxious. Given those deaths, and that my grandmother passed away in August (7 years ago, has it really been so long?), bright sunny warm summer days tend to fill me with dread and the idea that something bad will happen. The weather has, at least, been partially cooperating lately, in that it's been sunny, but pretty cool. Thank you for something, at least, Universe.
I just need to get past today. And then Sunday. And then Monday.
Maybe then I'll be able to breathe.
8w6d is what Wallaby measured when we found out about the missed miscarriage.
I know that size varies - at our first sono, he was measuring small, at the second, he was measuring big. There's no way to know when he actually died.
That doesn't really make today much less nerve-wracking. Thank god for our sanity scan on Monday. Though I almost took J up on her suggestion in the car this morning when she said we should just go in today and demand a scan. I can wait until Monday. I think.
Complicating things further, of course, is that Sunday is the Yarhzeit for both my brother and my grandfather. 6 years and 4 years, respectively. I miss my brother every day, but around anniversaries, I'm always more anxious. Given those deaths, and that my grandmother passed away in August (7 years ago, has it really been so long?), bright sunny warm summer days tend to fill me with dread and the idea that something bad will happen. The weather has, at least, been partially cooperating lately, in that it's been sunny, but pretty cool. Thank you for something, at least, Universe.
I just need to get past today. And then Sunday. And then Monday.
Maybe then I'll be able to breathe.
Monday, July 6, 2009
I don't wanna [a post by J]
I don't want to go to the doctor today. My doctor specializes in telling me I'm fat and could do to lose 100 pounds.
Quelle surprise, lady.
Thereafter: a trip to their barely-competent-but-hey-not-out-at-Labcorp-two-towns-over phlebotomist, so that I can prove once again that obese does not always mean thyroid-afflicted, polycystic of ovary, or diabetic.
Thereafter thereafter: enzyme replacement therapy for my special Jewish snowflake disease.
And then: Honeeeeeeyyy, come GET meeeeeeee.
And then there had better be ice cream.
Because my doctor will have told me I'm fat.
Quelle surprise, lady.
Thereafter: a trip to their barely-competent-but-hey-not-out-at-Labcorp-two-towns-over phlebotomist, so that I can prove once again that obese does not always mean thyroid-afflicted, polycystic of ovary, or diabetic.
Thereafter thereafter: enzyme replacement therapy for my special Jewish snowflake disease.
And then: Honeeeeeeyyy, come GET meeeeeeee.
And then there had better be ice cream.
Because my doctor will have told me I'm fat.
Counting
Today, I am 8w4d. I keep trying to remind myself that, whatever may or may not happen in the future, I'm pregnant right now.*
One week until our sanity scan.
One week and one day until we meet with the midwives.
Things we need to do: figure out what's going on with the peri, get some names and call for appointments. Find out if the peri will be able to do my blood tests, or if I really have to see three practices for the duration of this pregnancy. Talk to RE about scheduling a NT scan, since we don't know what's going on with the peri yet. Chill.
*It's funny, actually - during my pregnancy in the fall, I was constantly aware of Being Pregnant. I walked around, feeling like I beemed the words "I'm Pregnant!" from my eyes. This time around, though I'm certainly feeling the effects of pregnancy much more (in other words, I feel like CRAP), I keep having to remind myself. Oh, right. I'm wearing these pants that are hand-me-downs from friends because I'm Pregnant. or Oh! I'm exhausted all the time and all food sounds like crap and vaguely puke-inducing because I'm Pregnant. One of these days it'll sink in. Maybe.
One week until our sanity scan.
One week and one day until we meet with the midwives.
Things we need to do: figure out what's going on with the peri, get some names and call for appointments. Find out if the peri will be able to do my blood tests, or if I really have to see three practices for the duration of this pregnancy. Talk to RE about scheduling a NT scan, since we don't know what's going on with the peri yet. Chill.
*It's funny, actually - during my pregnancy in the fall, I was constantly aware of Being Pregnant. I walked around, feeling like I beemed the words "I'm Pregnant!" from my eyes. This time around, though I'm certainly feeling the effects of pregnancy much more (in other words, I feel like CRAP), I keep having to remind myself. Oh, right. I'm wearing these pants that are hand-me-downs from friends because I'm Pregnant. or Oh! I'm exhausted all the time and all food sounds like crap and vaguely puke-inducing because I'm Pregnant. One of these days it'll sink in. Maybe.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
It's a good thing I didn't NEED those drugs or anything...
Okay, so. A little background:
-somewhere after the positive beta, I submitted a request for a refill for my go.nal f pen, to replace the one my doctor's office gave me because... my insurance company was taking so long to fill the prescription.
-The day of the first sono, my doctor gave me the prescription for the loven.ox, which I promptly sent into my insurance company that day, for filling.
-Two weeks ago, my nurse said that she couldn't approve the pen, since I was pregnant, we'll call it a wash. Okay.
-Last week, she says that the insurance company told her the loven.ox was good to go.
Okay, we set?
So, yesterday I came into work to a message my insurance company left me (at work, at 6:30, wtf) the night before, but I didn't have time to call them yesterday. They called (my cell this time! hallelujah) last night. We missed the call, but called them back. After getting hung up on the first time, (and answering, twice, the "what can I help you with?" question with "I don't know, YOU called ME"), we found out that they were calling to let me know that the pen wouldn't be sent.
Okay, fine. We knew that. The woman's about to hang up, and I gesture frantically to J, who asks about the status of the Loven.ox, since we haven't seen any sign of THAT (and, despite my nurse's comment, on my home page, it was still listed as being verified). "Oh, yeah, that's been ready."
So... we were just supposed to have magic powers and KNOW that we should call them and tell them when to ship it? (I should note that the first time we ordered a trigger through their mail service, they never even told us it was coming; we just came home to a random box on the doorstep one night.) Despite the incident with the trigger, they won't send it but for signature-required, which means it has to be a Saturday delivery for us.
Well, obviously, they're not having deliveries THIS Saturday. Which means that we'll get the prescription that was written on June 16th... on July 11th. Provided nothing goes wrong.
All I have to say is thank god for y'all who hooked me up with extras, because this is ridiculous. When the meds come, I'll be 9w2d - Wallaby had already passed away at that point. The inneficiency, it boggles the mind.
If it weren't for the fact that we're saving 1/3 of the cost of the meds, and that I had these back-ups, so it wouldn't BE a problem when something like this happened... I don't even know.
(And THEN they asked me how we wanted to pay for it, so we gave them a CC number, and she put us on hold, only to come back and say that I'd already GIVEN them a CC number, and it was different, and if we wanted to change the form of payment, she would have to take the entire thing out of the system and start over. I'm pretty sure that she could hear our 'NO!' from halfway across the country, even without the phone.)
So. I'll have "my" Loven.ox in a little over a week. Good thing I didn't actually need it in a timely manner.
-somewhere after the positive beta, I submitted a request for a refill for my go.nal f pen, to replace the one my doctor's office gave me because... my insurance company was taking so long to fill the prescription.
-The day of the first sono, my doctor gave me the prescription for the loven.ox, which I promptly sent into my insurance company that day, for filling.
-Two weeks ago, my nurse said that she couldn't approve the pen, since I was pregnant, we'll call it a wash. Okay.
-Last week, she says that the insurance company told her the loven.ox was good to go.
Okay, we set?
So, yesterday I came into work to a message my insurance company left me (at work, at 6:30, wtf) the night before, but I didn't have time to call them yesterday. They called (my cell this time! hallelujah) last night. We missed the call, but called them back. After getting hung up on the first time, (and answering, twice, the "what can I help you with?" question with "I don't know, YOU called ME"), we found out that they were calling to let me know that the pen wouldn't be sent.
Okay, fine. We knew that. The woman's about to hang up, and I gesture frantically to J, who asks about the status of the Loven.ox, since we haven't seen any sign of THAT (and, despite my nurse's comment, on my home page, it was still listed as being verified). "Oh, yeah, that's been ready."
So... we were just supposed to have magic powers and KNOW that we should call them and tell them when to ship it? (I should note that the first time we ordered a trigger through their mail service, they never even told us it was coming; we just came home to a random box on the doorstep one night.) Despite the incident with the trigger, they won't send it but for signature-required, which means it has to be a Saturday delivery for us.
Well, obviously, they're not having deliveries THIS Saturday. Which means that we'll get the prescription that was written on June 16th... on July 11th. Provided nothing goes wrong.
All I have to say is thank god for y'all who hooked me up with extras, because this is ridiculous. When the meds come, I'll be 9w2d - Wallaby had already passed away at that point. The inneficiency, it boggles the mind.
If it weren't for the fact that we're saving 1/3 of the cost of the meds, and that I had these back-ups, so it wouldn't BE a problem when something like this happened... I don't even know.
(And THEN they asked me how we wanted to pay for it, so we gave them a CC number, and she put us on hold, only to come back and say that I'd already GIVEN them a CC number, and it was different, and if we wanted to change the form of payment, she would have to take the entire thing out of the system and start over. I'm pretty sure that she could hear our 'NO!' from halfway across the country, even without the phone.)
So. I'll have "my" Loven.ox in a little over a week. Good thing I didn't actually need it in a timely manner.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Miscellany
1. Summer vacation means people gone, means far less internet for me to amuse myself with while being a good little worker bee. C'mon, people. Don't you know that I need terrible links on FB to keep my brain occupied while my fingers type?
2. I am highly, highly amused by people at work who are convinced that I'm losing weight. "I don't know what you're doing, but keep it up!" "You look fantastic!" Awww, it's just that extra bloat you're seeing. "You're shining!" Psssht, that's just the manic look of exhaustion.
But seriously, it is funny to hear that, when all I can feel is my ass growing its own zip code, and all I can see is my bloated belly (I think the lovenox is making it worse, but who knows) looking like it's already 6 months pregnant. But hey, at least my po.rno boobs kind of make up for the growth I'm carrying around.
3. In response to the physical changes mentioned above, we pulled out the Forbidden Boxes that had been shoved away in one of the spare rooms since November. I know it's early, but with my changing shape, and the fact that most pants I own have inside buttons which irritate my bruised and bloated belly, we thought it would be prudent to sort through and see if there was anything I could wear now. Much to my surprise and delight: there was! Much to my dismay: I've gained a bunch of weight since the last pregnancy (shock), and things that fit me then are not fitting me now. So, I'll have to try it all on again, and do further sorting. But it's awfully nice to not be quite so self-conscious about the boobs and the belly, and (as much as I enjoy skirts and dresses) wear pants that don't bother my stomach.
In completely separate news, have a meme! I didn't do the last one that S tagged me for, because I'm terrible at doing these things. But! I'm doing this one.
I find this one especially hilarious, given that I can't stand my own writing, and spend most of the time I spend on writing the posts wondering how many readers I'll drive away with my ADD ramblings. ;-) But thank you!
For the Kreativ Blogger award the rules of acceptance are simple: list seven things you love and then pass the award to seven blogs you love.
Let's see if I can come up with 7 things. Fair warning: this list will likely be heavily influenced by my current state.
1. My wife
2. Pickles
3. Sleep
4. Baby Head Smell
5. The Water
6. Curling
7. Traveling
As for blogs that I love... only 7? How on earth am I supposed to choose only 7?
1. Looking for a Little Turtle
2. Two Chicks...
3. An Offering of Love
4. Project Kjetl
5. Eeney Meeney
6. Waiting for Mavis
7. Just a Pair of Moms...
8. and YOU. Seriously. You don't want me to count the number of blogs I have in my reader, and picking only 7 was just about impossible. I don't know how I would've made it this far without my internet community. Thank you.
2. I am highly, highly amused by people at work who are convinced that I'm losing weight. "I don't know what you're doing, but keep it up!" "You look fantastic!" Awww, it's just that extra bloat you're seeing. "You're shining!" Psssht, that's just the manic look of exhaustion.
But seriously, it is funny to hear that, when all I can feel is my ass growing its own zip code, and all I can see is my bloated belly (I think the lovenox is making it worse, but who knows) looking like it's already 6 months pregnant. But hey, at least my po.rno boobs kind of make up for the growth I'm carrying around.
3. In response to the physical changes mentioned above, we pulled out the Forbidden Boxes that had been shoved away in one of the spare rooms since November. I know it's early, but with my changing shape, and the fact that most pants I own have inside buttons which irritate my bruised and bloated belly, we thought it would be prudent to sort through and see if there was anything I could wear now. Much to my surprise and delight: there was! Much to my dismay: I've gained a bunch of weight since the last pregnancy (shock), and things that fit me then are not fitting me now. So, I'll have to try it all on again, and do further sorting. But it's awfully nice to not be quite so self-conscious about the boobs and the belly, and (as much as I enjoy skirts and dresses) wear pants that don't bother my stomach.
In completely separate news, have a meme! I didn't do the last one that S tagged me for, because I'm terrible at doing these things. But! I'm doing this one.
I find this one especially hilarious, given that I can't stand my own writing, and spend most of the time I spend on writing the posts wondering how many readers I'll drive away with my ADD ramblings. ;-) But thank you!
For the Kreativ Blogger award the rules of acceptance are simple: list seven things you love and then pass the award to seven blogs you love.
Let's see if I can come up with 7 things. Fair warning: this list will likely be heavily influenced by my current state.
1. My wife
2. Pickles
3. Sleep
4. Baby Head Smell
5. The Water
6. Curling
7. Traveling
As for blogs that I love... only 7? How on earth am I supposed to choose only 7?
1. Looking for a Little Turtle
2. Two Chicks...
3. An Offering of Love
4. Project Kjetl
5. Eeney Meeney
6. Waiting for Mavis
7. Just a Pair of Moms...
8. and YOU. Seriously. You don't want me to count the number of blogs I have in my reader, and picking only 7 was just about impossible. I don't know how I would've made it this far without my internet community. Thank you.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Thank you, and keep the advice coming
I wanted to add some clarification to the previous post, with information about the dog.
He's a Jack Russell, for what that's worth, and only 1.5, to give you an idea of breed and age in regards to his, uh. energy levels.
(and yes, Lyn, it's like being pregnant with a toddler. A toddler who won't let you know when they need to use the restroom, and just goes where they are. Ugh. we're working on that.)
-He has chew toys. He doesn't use them. Chewing is entirely food-based or revenge-based for him. (i.e. He pulls yogurt containers out of the trash and goes to town on them. Or tampons, but that's really too gross to think about.) We have a k.ong for him (a chew toy that you can put food in), but he gets the food out really quickly and loses interest, and then it bounces away and gets lost for a few months until we buy a new one (and then inevitably find the old).
-He doesn't play fetch. He'll do so, on a very limited basis, when he wants to (i.e., he brings you the ball - if you just throw it, he couldn't care less) and only if the ball is within a few feet. On the plus side, this will occasionally trigger a turbo (those of you who've been around JRs probably know what I'm talking about), but it doesn't always. On the down side, he won't chase anything further than a few feet, especially if it's not one of his special balls. At the dog park, he'll run sometimes with the other dogs for a few feet before he sees something off to the side and investigates that instead of chasing the ball/stick/whatever.
-I would love love love if we had a porch or fenced yard to put him out in, but we don't, so inside it is. Outside, he must always be on a leash - we have people in the neighborhood who will report you if you break this law.
-He already knows pretty much all the commands you guys have suggested. He knows sit, down, off, leave it, and out, among others. The problem isn't that - it's that he only uses them when he feels like it. We call him ADDog, and not as a joke. Any time his energy gets ramped up at all, he stops listening. As soon as he feels like we're not paying attention to him (read: always) he acts up and stops listening. This can be because we just got home from work (even though he's been played with not an hour before, but not by US), if we're cooking, doing laundry, paying attention to the cats, etc. (eta: We've tried click training, we've tried water bottles. For when he pulls on walks, we have a gentle leader, but none of the things work as soon as you stop using them. He knows the commands, but follows them to the letter, not the spirit. You tell him off, and he'll jump off, and jump right back on.)
-He's crate trained, and spends most of the day while we're at work in his crate (neighbor boys come by in the afternoon to take him out and play with him). We've used the crate (and the basement, before he ended up causing damage) as a punishment tactic - it hasn't worked. I don't know if we haven't been consistant enough with it, or if he just doesn't care - as smart as he is, he seems to have the memory of a goldfish.
Again, I want to emphasize that we're in no way afraid of him jumping up on the (potential) baby, or harming it or us. Instead, we're worried about whether we'll be able to give him what he needs, if there's a way to lower his... "expectations" for lack of a better word, and what kind of damage he'll do to the house if we can't.
Seriously - he's too smart for his own good, and it really is all about the attention. If we're home all day, he's FINE. He chills with us and plays and is happy. J was home sick a while back and napped most of the day, and he ripped up a bunch of stuff from the trash and peed on her pillow (nowhere else - he got up on the bed, got on her pillow, looked right at her and peed on it). This is the dog who, figuring out that we were using a hand held rug cleaner to clean up his messes, got so mad that he figured out where it was plugged in and peed on the surge protector (causing sparking and much panicking on our part).
We had no problems last year, but with the miscarriage, it kind of went downhill, with our energy levels taking a massive dumpster dive. It's hard to keep up with him now and I really do worry about doing so while taking care of a newborn. But he's part of the family; I can't imagine in the least parting with him. But I want to do what's best for both us and him. In the very very slim chance that we did decide it was best to part ways, my old co-worker who gave him to us will take him back. But it makes me cry just to think about that.
ETA: I just went back and read this, and it really sounds like we're just complaining, and we're not. He's the sweetest dog ever, and really kind and loyal and caring. And honestly, most of the time, he's really calm and chill, it's just that the not-calm-and-chill times are so much more draining that they take on such an epic proportion of energy spent. And the things that set him off - new people, lack of attention, etc - are things that will only get worse as pregnancy goes on and a new baby (hopefully) joins the family.
He's a Jack Russell, for what that's worth, and only 1.5, to give you an idea of breed and age in regards to his, uh. energy levels.
(and yes, Lyn, it's like being pregnant with a toddler. A toddler who won't let you know when they need to use the restroom, and just goes where they are. Ugh. we're working on that.)
-He has chew toys. He doesn't use them. Chewing is entirely food-based or revenge-based for him. (i.e. He pulls yogurt containers out of the trash and goes to town on them. Or tampons, but that's really too gross to think about.) We have a k.ong for him (a chew toy that you can put food in), but he gets the food out really quickly and loses interest, and then it bounces away and gets lost for a few months until we buy a new one (and then inevitably find the old).
-He doesn't play fetch. He'll do so, on a very limited basis, when he wants to (i.e., he brings you the ball - if you just throw it, he couldn't care less) and only if the ball is within a few feet. On the plus side, this will occasionally trigger a turbo (those of you who've been around JRs probably know what I'm talking about), but it doesn't always. On the down side, he won't chase anything further than a few feet, especially if it's not one of his special balls. At the dog park, he'll run sometimes with the other dogs for a few feet before he sees something off to the side and investigates that instead of chasing the ball/stick/whatever.
-I would love love love if we had a porch or fenced yard to put him out in, but we don't, so inside it is. Outside, he must always be on a leash - we have people in the neighborhood who will report you if you break this law.
-He already knows pretty much all the commands you guys have suggested. He knows sit, down, off, leave it, and out, among others. The problem isn't that - it's that he only uses them when he feels like it. We call him ADDog, and not as a joke. Any time his energy gets ramped up at all, he stops listening. As soon as he feels like we're not paying attention to him (read: always) he acts up and stops listening. This can be because we just got home from work (even though he's been played with not an hour before, but not by US), if we're cooking, doing laundry, paying attention to the cats, etc. (eta: We've tried click training, we've tried water bottles. For when he pulls on walks, we have a gentle leader, but none of the things work as soon as you stop using them. He knows the commands, but follows them to the letter, not the spirit. You tell him off, and he'll jump off, and jump right back on.)
-He's crate trained, and spends most of the day while we're at work in his crate (neighbor boys come by in the afternoon to take him out and play with him). We've used the crate (and the basement, before he ended up causing damage) as a punishment tactic - it hasn't worked. I don't know if we haven't been consistant enough with it, or if he just doesn't care - as smart as he is, he seems to have the memory of a goldfish.
Again, I want to emphasize that we're in no way afraid of him jumping up on the (potential) baby, or harming it or us. Instead, we're worried about whether we'll be able to give him what he needs, if there's a way to lower his... "expectations" for lack of a better word, and what kind of damage he'll do to the house if we can't.
Seriously - he's too smart for his own good, and it really is all about the attention. If we're home all day, he's FINE. He chills with us and plays and is happy. J was home sick a while back and napped most of the day, and he ripped up a bunch of stuff from the trash and peed on her pillow (nowhere else - he got up on the bed, got on her pillow, looked right at her and peed on it). This is the dog who, figuring out that we were using a hand held rug cleaner to clean up his messes, got so mad that he figured out where it was plugged in and peed on the surge protector (causing sparking and much panicking on our part).
We had no problems last year, but with the miscarriage, it kind of went downhill, with our energy levels taking a massive dumpster dive. It's hard to keep up with him now and I really do worry about doing so while taking care of a newborn. But he's part of the family; I can't imagine in the least parting with him. But I want to do what's best for both us and him. In the very very slim chance that we did decide it was best to part ways, my old co-worker who gave him to us will take him back. But it makes me cry just to think about that.
ETA: I just went back and read this, and it really sounds like we're just complaining, and we're not. He's the sweetest dog ever, and really kind and loyal and caring. And honestly, most of the time, he's really calm and chill, it's just that the not-calm-and-chill times are so much more draining that they take on such an epic proportion of energy spent. And the things that set him off - new people, lack of attention, etc - are things that will only get worse as pregnancy goes on and a new baby (hopefully) joins the family.
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